Glasgow Stag Do

I’ll be straight with you. A Glasgow stag do is for a group that wants a proper night out rather than a polite one. The city is big, friendly and loud, the pubs are full of locals who’ll chat to you without being asked, and the bars run from old boozers to slick cocktail places. It’s one of the easiest cities in the UK to fill a weekend without planning every minute.

Glaswegians are famous for their humour, and your stag will be fair game. If he turns up in a borrowed kilt, somebody at the bar will ask him what’s under it. Let them. It’s part of the service.

Edinburgh gets the postcards, Glasgow gets the party. I’d pick it for groups who care more about the night than the castle.

The nightlife is spread across a few distinct patches. I’d build the weekend around two of them rather than trying to conquer the lot.

• Merchant City. Grand old buildings in the centre turned into bars and restaurants. Good for night one, while everyone’s still on their best behaviour.
• Sauchiehall Street. The long, loud stretch for late bars and clubs. It isn’t pretty and it doesn’t pretend to be.
• Finnieston. The trendy end of town, packed with good bars and better food. Book a table here and the groom might even eat a vegetable.
• The West End. Studenty and charming, with the cobbled bars of Ashton Lane at its heart.

For a bit of local folklore, try the Subcrawl. You ride the Subway loop and hop off for a drink near each station. Nobody has ever finished it looking good. Do your drinking in the pubs, not on the trains.

Glasgow puts you within easy reach of proper Scottish countryside, which is where the best daytime fun lives. A Highland Games stag do is the obvious pick. Caber tossing, tug of war and hammer throwing, usually in kilts, usually with a dram at the end. It’s daft, it’s competitive, and it gets the quieter lads involved early.

Clay pigeon shooting is easy to pick up and suits mixed groups. If you’d rather stay in town, a guided pub crawl saves you from leading a gang of grown men around in the rain with your phone out.

Beer fans should look at the Tennent’s brewery tour at Wellpark Brewery on Duke Street, which is about as Glaswegian as an afternoon gets. Tours are for over 18s and places are limited, so book ahead for a big group. The city takes its comedy seriously too, so a comedy night is a cracking way to start the Saturday evening.

Trains run straight into the city centre from London and across the north, and Glasgow Airport has flights from plenty of UK airports. The centre is walkable, and the Subway and taxis will get you to the West End and back.

If you fancy a two-city Glasgow stag weekend, Edinburgh is a short train ride away. You could do the day in one and the night in the other, or book a separate Edinburgh stag do and let the stag decide which city he liked better.

• No drinking in the street. Glasgow has byelaws against drinking alcohol in public places. Keep the cans for the hotel or the house.
• Bring ID. Doormen are hot on it, and the lad who looks forty will still get asked.
• Pack a coat. It rains, whatever month you pick. Late spring to early autumn gives you the best shot at a dry day for outdoor activities.
• Fancy dress. Kilts go down well. Full costumes are fine in most pubs, but smarter bars may turn away a big group in matching outfits, so ring ahead.
• Book early. Plenty of bars won’t take a large stag party without notice. Our stag do organising advice covers the rest.

Glasgow’s nightlife is spread across a few patches, so I’d pick the base to suit the two you care about most. For most groups that means the city centre, around Merchant City. The grand old buildings there have been turned into bars and restaurants, Sauchiehall Street is within reach for the late ones, and the trains from London and the north come straight into the centre, so the bags are dropped in no time. The centre is walkable, which is exactly what you want at closing time.

If the lads are more into good food and nice bars than a loud club, the West End is the alternative. It’s studenty and charming, with the cobbled bars of Ashton Lane at its heart, and Finnieston, the trendy end of town, is the place for the better food.

My practical tip: wherever you sleep, the Subway and taxis will get you between the centre and the West End and back, so you don’t have to pick just one side of the city to drink in.

Friday Arrive by train or through Glasgow Airport and head for Merchant City for night one, while everyone is still on their best behaviour. I’d book a table somewhere in those grand old buildings, because bars won’t take a big group without notice, and keep the first night civilised. Ish. If the stag turns up in a borrowed kilt, he’s fair game for the locals, and that’s half the fun.

Saturday Start with something competitive. Go karting or paintballing both get the quieter lads involved early. In the afternoon, the Tennent’s brewery tour at Wellpark Brewery on Duke Street is about as Glaswegian as it gets (over 18s only, which shouldn’t be a problem). Then dinner in Finnieston, and on to Sauchiehall Street for the long, loud stretch of late bars and clubs. If the stag fancies losing his money in style, round it off at the casino. Everyone brings ID, because the doormen are hot on it.

Sunday Take it slow over in the West End and find a quiet table on Ashton Lane. If anyone has the legs for it, the Subcrawl is the daft finale. You ride the Subway loop and stop for a drink near each station. Do the drinking in the pubs, not on the trains, and remember the byelaws against drinking in public places. Nobody has ever finished it looking good, so take photos.